Envelope / Develope

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash I reached this conclusion, influenced by one of my dates. She was an attractive grand-mother I met through some friends and in one of our dates she mentioned that, through life, she always wanted to celebrate small events in her life: kids managing to ride a bike first place in a school competition for kids learning something new and applying it (first time) successfully in life  getting the first client in a business moving to a new place working hard and failing successfully and learning the hard way something I was not that type of person, but having a daughter and "suffering" with her through failures and small victories, I understood in the monotone rhythm of life there are not many "grand" celebrations and we should punctuate our existence, enjoying small victories. Sometimes, life is not giving you many big victories and you have to have the next prize on the horizon to keep you going. And here I am, ...

Photo by Jamie Morrison on Unsplash Before You are in a relationship and after a while are sensing there is distance between you and your partner. All the gestures are there, with the same intensity but they look like 999 rehearsed plays of your life. For outsiders everything seems to be fine but you already left the character. There is no more dynamism, you hate the stagnation and the stale taste of life near a partner who is old in habits and does not come with any new ideas to heighten daily life. What is next, you wonder? Where have you been drifting, after a while? If you've been a mouse all your life, you cannot dream to fly like an eagle all of a sudden, don't you? In Between And together, you and he, decide to split for a while and live separate lives. At the beginning is the urge to go back just because the habits are ingrained in you like a drug, absence of them is hard, your mind is stuck in the same movement. Then, after a while, resisting the impulse you j...

Can say with assurance that the subject of my failed short relationship (mostly imaginary) is coming to an end with this last post. I turned it on many facets, analyzed it for my futile understanding, built explanations for deciphering meaning, but the emotional bleeding is becoming dry. Life goes on and I wish everyone, no matter what role they played in it, to move on, to enjoy life. There are a few more posts that were written in the last few days but they will probably not be published. You got  the gist of what happened, a few more theories are an over-extended tired saga. It was one of my mistakes , of many that will come, that slowly will make me re-adjust, re-think and look at life in a different light. Although not old, I am at an age when some things are no longer possible, others become available, where I have roots or connections that are hard to change, they are imprinted in my brain. More roots had unexpectedly grown and is where I redirected some energy, lately. I...

What do you want to be the most important thing to teach Emma?    What is the most important advice you will give your kids, looking back to your life?    This is coming from Marin Preda, "The most loved earthling" book- if there is no love, nothing is. Chase love and stick with quality people, bother them, cherish them and give them your time. What I would like is leaving Emma with a framework of understanding life and people that can be passed onto her kids. Life is difficult if you don't understand the big currents in life and how people function, driven by the same dreams for thousands of years. But the most important thing is to really care about people. Empathy for others, listening to their problems and helping out cannot be taught, it is in your structure or not. And she has it. Work hard and be humble is the Kipp school slogan and I like it. I have seen many fallen stars because they were staring at their own light. We are not in the show business...

You stop and look back, in time.  I have this image in mind, where the portrait of a person is taken when she is half-turning her body towards the camera. It seems like her life is going forward and the portrait is just a step-back in time, literally. It froze that moment, where the spirit is paused but the life continues without you really participating. It is not my contraption, is a signature of many ads and commercials, but the significance seemed fit for my post. Do you have doubts about your life, about your decisions which were not yours, in reality? The agency problem came back to me when my daughter announced she is making her own choices, from now on. She's six. Tough to argue! When was the worst case of day-dreaming in your career, what was the decision made out of fear or just inertia pushed you in? How did you escape, do you (now) recognize the pause in the brain waves and do you jump in a repetitive mechanics of your body, just to get rid of the obsessive feeling...